Some thoughts on vaccinations.

I was watching a news clip this morning, featuring a man who has done research in connecting vaccines with autism. Totally brought me back to 5 years ago when we first started vaccinating Rowan.
I guess you can probably see where I'm going with this.

I'm not gonna spend this time harping on whether or not I think people should vaccinate, because we are all aware that vaccines can be very helpful and preventative. What I am going to say here is, please, pretty please with a cherry on top, get educated about vaccines. Read both sides of the story. You need to know what is in these concoctions that you are having injected into your infants. At the very least, do a google search about the connection with vaccines and autism. You'll see lots of theories and explanations, but you need to read about it. You really do. I wish we had.
Go here and see the list of vaccines, what is in them, who makes them, etc.  http://www.informedchoice.info/cocktail.html

A few things, though, that I will mention right here that I believe to be very important:
Do not give your baby the Hep B shot at the hospital. It is completely unnecessary and their body is not capable of handling that.
Wait to vaccinate until your baby is at least 18 months old. If you can't wait, please consider doing a revised schedule of vaccines where you get one shot per appointment, with a month or two in between. And have the shots split up, i.e. get the MMR split up into separate measles, mumps and rubella vaccines and get them one at a time.

I pray that nobody is feeling guilty or condemned for not researching this prior to vaccinations, or for just taking their pediatricians advice.  Doctors are awesome and I'd hate to see life without them. But, they are uneducated in regards to what is actually in these shots, and the American Medical Association sees to it that they are not taught these things.
A conspiracy theorist I am not, but one thing I do know. If parents stopped vaccinating, the pharmacuetical industry would freak out and our economy would collapse.  Vaccines are very important to the government, they're a big money-maker for the country and world. So when you read articles defending the use of vaccines, consider the source and the funding behind those studies.

And because this is my blog, I can tell you this. I believe 100% that, if you are a Christian (meaning that you have a daily, ongoing relationship with Jesus), He can tell you by the Holy Spirit which shots to get and not to get.  He can show you the way you should go.  But lest we forget, He gave us brains. When you ride in the car, do you know it's safer to wear your seat belt? Common sense.
So let's understand about vaccines.
When you plop your kid on that paper-covered table at the doc, you need to know for sure if the seat belt is vaccinations, or if it's not.  I tend to lean towards 'not'.  I think the best seat belt you can give your child is prayer, a healthy diet, washing hands and a strong immune system, at least until the age of 2 when their immune system is more ready. And even then, you need to know that some vaccines are absolutely useless. (Hep B, chicken pox and Rotavirus. So stupid. Google it.)

Get educated, because autism is just increasing, and there is an undeniable connection with immunizations.   I hate to say it, but it's true. 

I know some of you are wondering if I think vaccines caused Rowan's autism. I'll tell you flat out, I am positive they contributed. Whether it was the cause, I won't know til I see Jesus.  But knowing what I know now, I can say with certainty that had I known before, I wouldn't have done it. 

Bless you guys. Go get educated!
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-31727_162-20049118-10391695.html
http://www.generationrescue.org/
http://www.taca.org

Still don't believe it.

And don't even try to convince me, ok?
Cuz I'm not buyin' it.
It is not even possible that Rowan is in Kindergarten.
Is it?
It is. Ok.

I need a sec.

I'm sort of a freak. I still can't get over it.
Why is it so hard to believe how far he's come in the past 2 years?
I mean really?
I think about what Ro was like before we started the GFCF diet, all the other treatments and the ABA therapy. 
Before he could even tell us his name, what he wanted for breakfast, if he had to go potty, if he was sad, mad, if he wanted us to stop what we were doing...he couldn't communicate at. all.
And I remember being in the pits of despair last year, wondering if God was even real, and if He is, what in the world was He thinking? Does He even know what is going on here?!

Things are always harder when you can't see what they're good for.  What possible good could come out of Ro having autism right now? What possible good could come from going to the darkest place in my heart? What could possibly be the reason for the agony our hearts went through when we were told that our firstborn son was not what we dreamed he would be.

I'll tell you what good came of it.

This.

And this.

And this.

Because God IS real, and He works all things together for the good of those who love Him.  Sometimes, the only way to see the reason for things is to get to the bottom of where you are so that all you can do is look up and see God. And give it all up. Ya know? Anyone been there too?

Ro is in a mainstream class. Doesn't even need a 1:1 aide.  I never knew if I'd ever say that. And you know what his teachers say?

"Rowan is amazing! He keeps surprising us with things he knows and can do! I can't even believe it! He is such a joy."

I still believe he will be healed. Because whether now or later, God's glory is gonna be shown in his life, even more than it has been thus far. And because we asked Him to heal him. And because I believe God is bigger than autism, and in His perfect timing, He'll do it. Someday.

In the meantime, I enjoy every second with Rowan, where he's at and all of the things he's learning and growing in.  I take none of it, not even one second, for granted.
And with my family.
With these children who keep me on my toes and drive me to the brink of insanity while at the same time causing my heart to burst out of my chest with love.  I savor every moment with my husband, watching him raise these kids in integrity and in the Word. Teaching them about the Lord.  

And just to brag on Joel a little, here's something that happened that made my day.
The kids came down this morning and this was our conversation.

Asher: "Hey mommy, God spoke to Samuel!"
Me: "Well, yes He did honey."
Asher: "Yeah, and Samuel heard Gods' voice."
Me: "Yeah!"
Bella: "Samuel said, "here I am, Lord."
Me: "Wow you guys, you know all about Samuel! Where did you learn this?"
Asher: "Daddy teaches us in our room when we go to bed. And mommy, Jesus lives in my heart."

Yeah. That's my husband. And I'm keeping him forever.

The hard stuff is worth it.  The sacrifices are always worth it, if God is telling you to go for it. Whatever it is that you are battling, don't be afraid to dream big and go for gold. Go for God. Believe that He really does know what He's doing. You can be mad that you're going through it. You can even be angry that God is letting it happen.
But do not, for one second, forget that He is good. Above all, He is good. And He knows what He's doing. And there's a peace that passes understand, and you can have it, if you want it. Just ask and wait. And believe He's still on the throne.

He can heal Ro of autism. He hasn't, but He can.  That should make me mad but it doesn't. Know why? Cuz He's God and I'm not, and He loves Ro more than I do.  Once I really believed that, the peace came.

Go for the peace, friends. He's got it, and it's free for the taking. Just believe Him.

Letter to Rowan

Rowan,
Today is June 29th, 2011. You have come so very far in the last year since we moved to Oswego. The ABA therapy that you have had every day has begun to bring you out of your shell. Life has been difficult for you thus far, but thanks to the Lord and his faithfulness, you are beginning to step into the normal world. Slowly but surely, you are coming out of autism!  From the day you started having the therapists visit and play with you, and push your buttons, you've been improving and dealing with life much better. You have learned how to cope with changes around you, and with people or things that bother you. You used to scream, hit, yell, throw things, and now, you just say 'no thank you'. And if it doesn't stop, you either move on, or deal with it. Wow, just amazing! YOU are amazing. We rejoice daily watching you grow.
You can ask for things you want, say 'no thank you' when you don't want something. You're even attempting spontaneous sentences! You know more content than a 6 year old kid who doesn't have any special needs! You are very very smart. Everyone is amazed by how smart you are. You can count by 5s, and 10s, all the way to 100! You know all of your colors, numbers, shapes, animals and their sounds, you can match things, point out what things are different in a  set of like objects…just amazing.  And another thing we just discovered....
We're pretty sure you have perfect pitch.
And you can keep a beat! Just plain amazing.  Even if the music is complicated and crazy, you keep the beat.
You are also starting to want to play with other kids, at least with Asher and Bella. That is such a joy to us. Little by little, you are learning how to do things that will make your life much easier down the road.  I know that you understand more than we think you do, and that you will remember all that we've said and done for you. We pray that you'll remember the way we've invested in you spirutually, as well as educationally. You are so precious to the Lord.
Just remember, when you are having a hard time, you are not alone. We are with you and we love you, and God is always with you and loves you even more.

You have a great destiny in Him, and we can't wait to see it.
You are 5 years old and a miracle to us. We thank God for you every day!